5 Ways You May Be Inviting Struggle Into Your Life
When I first started writing this post I wanted to start it with, “we all struggle” or “everyone struggles” but that isn’t the truth. The truth is, that is a story I tell myself, maybe a story you tell yourself, but it’s just a story. Our world is filled with stories, some we learned, some we created… but they are all just fictional tales of how we think life occurs. Our stories usually include how we think other people think too. We attribute our personal emotional reactions to other people and say, “How can they do that?” assuming that they feel like we do… or maybe “if only they knew” as we convince ourselves we have cornered the market on brilliant insight.
The real truth? We are all uniquely divine. We create in every moment of our day the physical world that surrounds us… and we are hoarders. We feel like there isn’t enough to go around, like if we let go of something or someone it is lost or worse… it will be come someone elses… and by being with someone else, that thing or person is no longer with us.
I’m writing because there’s a psychic in my town that truly believes there isn’t enough room in our town for two psychics.
Am I the only one that feels the power of that statement and the push AGAINST abundance? It didn’t bother me mostly because it wasn’t directed at me, it was directed at my mentor who has a thriving psychic reading business and wellness center. My friend is a very down to earth, what you see is what you get women. She tells it like it is… and some may find that abrasive, while others (like myself) appreciate the honesty and integrity.
And it got me thinking. I wonder how many customers the other psychic had literally pushed towards my friend simply with her attitude.
It also go me to wondering how many other people are so trapped in their focus on what they think that they don’t realize they are manifesting exactly what they don’t want. Love, Abundance and Freedom are just as easily manifested as Lack and Struggle…
Are you manifesting Lack & Limitations or Abundance and Freedom?
Here are 5 Ways you may be inviting Struggle into Your life
ONE: Use Your Words. Have you ever seen a toddler struggle to explain what they want to an adult? The adult (in their effort to instruct) may say, “Use your words sweetheart, tell me what you want”. And so starts a long life of communicating through verbal sounds with meanings to which we all agree. Initially as a child you wouldn’t have much emotional attachment to words, you’d use them as tools for communication… and eventually you’d learn the power of words. Words of love, words of hate, words of want, words of need. We’re all familiar with the words that trigger. Our society is hyper conscious of being “politically correct”, so much so, that some words have been removed from societies vocabulary. Like books. Words hold no emotional value in and of themselves, it is our feeling about those words that gives them value and that value is taught. For example, as a child you wouldn’t have had any emotional attachment to the word “money”.
You were taught things about money. Maybe you were taught it should be saved for a rainy day. Maybe you were taught that there was never enough of it. Maybe you were taught you have to work hard for it. Maybe you were taught you deserve it without working for it. The point is that Money is a word. It describes a thing. BUT how you feel about that word is all inside you. If you have negative feelings about money, like the ones I listed above… lack, difficulty, scarcity… then I suggest you stop using that word to describe your finances.
The same goes with other words like: Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Wife, Husband, Job, Work, Relationship. Look at the words your using and think about how they make you feel. Do they fill you with a joyful energy or a “wanting sense of lack” kind of energy? Change your words, and you’ll change your outcome.
TWO: The story your words build. Words strung together make sentences, and those sentences build stories. We tell stories to everyone in our lives including ourselves. We tell our co-workers stories about the terrible traffic on the way into work, we tell our girlfriends about our cheating boyfriend or husband, and we tell anyone that will listen (P.S. you are always listening) how much you wish things were different and easier. You story (jam packed with your trigger words) is keeping you exactly where you are right now.
Maybe it’s a story about the past and how you felt back then. Maybe you recently loaned someone money and they haven’t paid it back as promised. Maybe you think about it and then think about all of the times you’ve loaned money and haven’t received it back. Maybe you tell yourself that people like to take advantage of your kind nature. Maybe you tell yourself you need to stop being so nice. That’s certainly one story.
Another story would be, “I’m going to stop lending money I can’t afford to lend” or “I have a policy of only lending money and not really expecting it back” or “I don’t lend money out, but I can help you earn money or raise money.” My point is… you get to choose the story. Pick a story that feels better.
THREE: You are responsible for your story. Taking responsibility for your story is hard, because once you take responsibility you are now required to change something to change the outcome. As children and young adults we blamed our parents or lack of guidance and then as we got older we learned to blame the government or our boss. The truth is, it’s your story, if you want to tell a different story, you are the only person that can do that. No one is going to come along and tell you a new story about what’s possible for you… and you are miraculously going to be experiencing new outcomes.
Nope. That’s not how the universe works. However it will place people, situations and circumstances in your path to allow you the opportunity to become aware of different potential outcomes. It’s up to you to change your story.
It’s up to you to stop your well worn path and check in with your inner guidance to determine if the story you’re telling yourself right now about what’s possible… is serving you. The fact is, it’s scary to make changes. It’s hard to let go of pain and guilt and hurt… especially since the world so loves a good story about pain, guilt and hurt. But is that story serving you? Is that story helping you move in the direction of your soul? If it’s not, then it’s time to unpack your story. You don’t need to rewrite the whole thing at once, but maybe just check in. Understand that you were built for joy, if you aren’t experiencing joy… ask the universe to help you recognize opportunities for more joy.
FOUR: Release your HOW. Are you laser focused on the getting the lawnmower back from your neighbor that you lent it to in the beginning of the summer? Or maybe money or jewelry or your favorite pair of shoes? You attention to exactly HOW you want something and from exactly WHOM, may actually be blocking the universe from providing and over-providing in the area of your focus. I have this problem (I’m a bit of a control freak). I wanted to manifest $10,000.00. I set the intention and I visualized it in my bank and then I set out to visualize exactly how I would achieve it. I focused on that lump sum of money… and while I did manifest it in a lump sum… eventually, while I waited for it to “materialize” I completely missed thousands of potential opportunities, because they didn’t fit into my “how”.
In other words, I was so focused on the lump sum, that I didn’t pay attention to the thousands of ways smaller sums could and would come to me to build up to the total of $10,000. In retrospect, after my manifestation I realized that I would have actually had it sooner if I had been paying attention to my inner guidance and to the opportunities I came across and was less focused on exactly “how” I expected that to manifest the money.
My epiphany is … is $10,000 less valuable when it comes in small amounts? If I create a business that earns $10,000 a month in dribs and drabs of $100 – $500, is that less valuable then waiting 6 months to be handed $10,000. like I expected? No it isn’t is it. It’s all about awareness and allowing the universe to provide the “how” to your “what”.
FIVE: Non-Judgement. We are always analyzing and measuring evaluating and calculating ourselves, ourselves in relationship to the world around us, the world around us. The fact is everything in our world is about relationships. I hope you don’t mind that word, because I’m going to use it a lot in the paragraph. You have a relationship with your family, friends and coworkers, yes? You also have a relationship with your car, garden, mailbox, shoes and clothes. Everything about you is a relationship. You feel something about everything, whether it’s deeply (Like: These clothes make me look fat) or more mechanically, (like: time to get the oil changed in my Honda Accord) either way, it’s the ongoing narrative in your life. This is how we function, this is how everyone functions… we compare where we think we are right now, with what we think we know about what’s around us.
The problem with this part of your story is when you believe that the world is being “done to you.” In other words, when you release your strength and power to make choices and believe that it’s the bad things around you that are causing you to experience bad things. Fight the urge to believe the story the world is feeding you about your powerlessness and choose a different story.
And pay attention. Pay attention to how you collect evidence to support your new story. This retraining of your awareness will have nearly immediate benefits as you will start to notice more and more of what you want easily occurring in your life. BUT (and this is a big but) not everyone will enjoy the new non-judgmental you. Like I said, the world loves lack and limitation. Being limitless will be scary for people and they will fight back.
They will try to make you feel bad about being happy and free. (you are warned) You may need to release more than just your attachment to lack and limitation, you may need to put some distance between you and people that encourage you to feel less then the amazing and unique person that you are.
You are who you tell yourself you are, and you are always listening. Your “I am” statements are powerful and prophetic. Listen to the story you tell yourself and check in with how it feels. Does it feel good? Then gently encourage yourself into another story. Sometimes better feeling stories are just a small step up the emotional ladder, because it’s hard for someone experiencing depression to imagine a jump to “joy”, but maybe they can take the step up to frustration and camp out there for a bit. You see, frustration isn’t joy… but it’s a little better then depression and sorrow.
In order to know if you are telling a story that doesn’t serve you, you only need to ask yourself (even say it outloud) “How do I feel about this?” and if the answer is anything less then Joyfilled and Abundant, then it’s time to unpack your story and find out where you can take a detour to abundance.
Have an amazing day.